An illustration of various Filipino food offering laid out on an altar with a religious portrait

Food for the Soul

October 9, 2025Janica Arthel Alba

They say grief is love with nowhere to go. It makes a lot of sense then that food—an expression that encompasses multiple love languages—has a significant place across various customs and traditions dedicated to the dead.

After all, food is a thoughtful service in its preparation; a nourishing gift given; a warm invitation to spend time together. “Kumain ka na?” are familiar words given with such ease, speaking to care that comes naturally; “Hati tayo,” the act of sharing a single drink or food, a kind of physical intimacy. Such fond sentiments persist in our hearts for the departed, and we continue to express them even after they’re gone. And as there are myriad ways one says “I love you,” so are the many and varied mourning rituals and foods one can encounter around the world.

In loving memory

Traditional Irish wakes are lively celebrations—a kind of last hurrah and farewell party—with stories of the deceased shared over food and drinks. Wake cakes are a staple at the tables, especially when there’s plenty of drinking. Similar to a pound cake, this rich, dense cake helps soak up the alcohol, allowing the celebration to keep going for as long as possible—a good send-off for a lost loved one.

Across Greece, particularly the Orthodox Christian community, koliva shares this bittersweet sentiment of farewell, if religiously inclined. Koliva is a sticky, sweet mixture mainly made of wheat, with varying additions like sugar, honey, dried fruits, nuts, and even chocolate. Reflecting Christian beliefs, the wheat is symbolic of resurrection and life eternal, as it needs to be buried to grow again, while the sweeter ingredients manifest the sweetness of a heavenly afterlife with God.

An illustration featuring Filipino atang, Japanese kyuri uma and nasu ushi, and Mexican pan de muerto

The atang of the Ilocano people is a more direct offering to the departed. The Ilocanos believe the soul doesn’t immediately depart and must be cared for during the wake, and even after, when the visiting spirit is welcomed back. And so they are sustained with atang, food offerings which often include: suman, patopat, linapet, balisongsong, or other kakanin; busi (caramelized popped rice); bigas shaped into a cross and topped with fresh eggs; sticky rice with coconut milk; and linga (black sesame seeds). These can be accompanied by water, basi (fermented sugarcane wine), tobacco, and other additions. Truly, a feast for the spirits.

Meanwhile, in Mexico, pan de muerto is a treat for both the living and the dead. This sweet bun is decorated with a dough shaped like crossbones on top, sprinkled with sugar that’s sometimes dyed pink. During Dia de los Muertos or the Day of the Dead, pan de muerto is laid on home altars called ofrenda, its sweetness luring and guiding spirits on their journey back to Earth. As the living eat their pan de muerto at the graves or ofrenda of departed loved ones, the spirits absorb the essence of their offerings—a meal once again shared between family long separated.

Much like Dia de los Muertos, Japan’s Obon festival welcomes visiting spirits back to the land of the living. Japanese households place offerings of food and incense on their home altars, alongside animal figurines made from vegetables called kyuri uma and nasu ushi that ferry souls to and from the spirit world. The kyuri uma is a cucumber horse intended for the spirit’s speedy arrival, while the nasu ushi is an eggplant cow meant for a slow departure; ultimately, the hope for a departed loved one to linger longer.

With deepest sympathy

As the deceased are lovingly remembered in mourning traditions, so are the bereaved, extending sympathy and care in their time of need.

In Sri Lankan Buddhist culture, more often in tight-knit communities, people pitch in to support the grieving family. After the deceased is laid to rest, the mala batha is held: a feast for those who paid their respects, as well as to nourish the lingering spirit before they move on. Though rather than unique funeral foods, common Sri Lankan fare—meatless, as meat is considered impure—is served: dahl (lentil curry), brinjal (eggplant) dishes, papadum (flatbread), tomato and onion sambol (chili-based sauce), leafy salads, and rice. What stands out beautifully about this tradition is that everyone comes together to cook. Even after the mala batha, neighbors continue to cook for them, understanding that the bereaved still need the community’s support.

In Korea, yukgaejang, a spicy beef and vegetable stew, is a common dish frequently served at funerals. Not only is it a popular comfort food, but is also a highly nutritious meal—an essential during this vulnerable period, as mourners try to stay awake during the days-long funeral. Practically, it’s an easy dish to make in bulk, with salt and spices that preserve the dish for a long time. 

From funeral-specific dishes and unique customs to beloved comfort foods and earnest portraits of community, these diverse food traditions are meaningful snapshots of different cultures. It’s a glimpse of how people grieve and handle grief; at the heart of it, how people love and handle love with nowhere to go. Yet, no matter the place or people, food is indeed a universal language of love, as spiritually nourishing as it is physically, providing comfort, fostering togetherness, and preserving the precious memories of lost loved ones.

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